But THIS is how I plan to stay CRAZY this year….
~On my Lunch Break, sit in my parked car with sunglasses on, and point a hair dryer at passing cars.
~Every time someone asks me to do something, ask “Do you want Fries with that?”
~Call my house and ask for myself. Don’t disguise my voice.
~In the memo field of my checks, write “For Smuggling Diamonds”
~Finish all my sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy…”
~As often as possible, Skip instead of walking.
~Order a Diet WATER when I go out to eat, and keep a straight face.
~Specify that my Drive Through order is “TO GO”
~Have my friends call me by my wrestling name, THE BALL BUSTER…
~When my money comes out of the ATM, scream, “I WON!! I WON!!”
~When I leave the Zoo, run through the parking lot screaming “RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! THEY’RE LOOSE!!!”
~Tell my children, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go….”